


Closing the door

by bennysparks



Category: EastEnders (TV)
Genre: Established Relationship, Homophobic Language, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-03
Updated: 2019-10-06
Packaged: 2020-11-22 11:37:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20873582
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bennysparks/pseuds/bennysparks
Summary: This one felt like it needed a third chapter, although I don't think it turned out exactly as I wanted it to.





	1. Chapter 1

"Babe. Let's just order a Chinese," Ben says, following Callum around the kitchen and picking up fallen items—cheese grater, canned lentils, boxes of teabags—before he can trip on them while ransacking the cupboards for anything edible enough for dinner.

A bag of rice goes next, spilling everywhere. Callum pauses long enough to say, "Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck!"

"I've got it," Ben says, shimmying past him and pulling open the door to the spare room to dig out the broom. He hears Callum open the fridge again. "I'm pretty sure those leftovers have gone off."

"Lexi needs a proper dinner," Callum says. "I swear there was some tomato sauce in here—"

"Even if there is, we ain't got no pasta," Ben sighs. He closes the spare room and starts sweeping up. "And most of the rice is on the floor right now."

"Sorry."

"See, I _ did _ actually know how much of a disaster you were before I moved in…"

Someone knocks on the door.

Ben pauses. "Who's that?"

"Lola and Lexi wouldn't bother knocking."

"I'll get the door, if you dig up the takeaway menus."

Callum exhales. "Fine, but we've already _ had _ Chinese this week."

"Whatever you want, dear." Ben doesn't bother looking back; he's halfway down the stairs when there is another knock that quickly turns into banging. "Awright, I hear ya, I'm coming." He jumps the last two steps. "Hang on," he calls through the door before twisting the deadbolt. The door is open five inches before he clocks who it is. "No, thanks, whatever you're selling, we ain't interested." He pushes on the door but there is already a foot wedged against it. "I said no thank you."

Jonno Highway is fuming on the front step. "Let me see my son."

"Pretty sure you gave up _ that _ right, sunshine. Go bother your other son. Oh, right. He don't want nothing to do with you neither."

"Fuck off you queer bent—"

"Ben?"

Callum is hovering at the top of the stairs. Ben braces his shoulders across the door and pushes. "I know this looks ridiculous," he says. "But apparently it's Father's Day or something. Time goes by so _ quickly. _ Reckon we should invite Phil over?"

Callum is suddenly at the bottom of the stairs and he's gripping Ben's hip like _ yes, I'm here. _ "Dad," he calls out. "What are you doing here?"

"Are you living with this—"

"Dad," Callum says, and Ben can't stop himself from smiling at the iron in his voice. He's the soft-hearted one, yes, but at some point he developed the kind of steel spine you only get from putting up with Ben Mitchell everyday for over a year. "I'm pretty sure we made it pretty clear last time, in the fall, that you ain't welcome here, right? Especially if you're gonna call my _ boyfriend _ slurs."

"I've got a right to talk to my son," Jonno hisses, and bangs on the door.

Ben can see that even though Callum is standing with his shoulders back, at his full height, he is white as a sheet. "Pretty sure you don't," Ben says. "Not if he don't want to talk to you, mate."

"Shut up the fuck—"

"Dad," Callum booms. "Why are you here?"

"Your brother ain't answering me."

"Stuart doesn't want to talk to you, Dad. Neither of us want to talk to you. Not if you're gonna be shitty to my boyfriend—"

"Way I hear about it, your brother nearly killed that—"

"He apologized," Ben says, loudly, and even Callum looks surprised. Ben isn't even exaggerating that much; he and Stuart have achieved something like peace between them, largely because they both want Callum to be happy. "We get on, Stuart and I. We are mates." The phrase _ brother-in-law _floats up, previously only applicable to fuckin' Keanu. He realizes they just kind of became family at some point and that is a lot to process. "We had Christmas dinner together here this year," he says, as much to himself as to the angry asshole on the front stoop. It's like he didn't realize it happened even though he was there.

"Oh, so now _ I'm _odd man out and not this freak—"

"Dad, why were you even trying to talk to Stuart? You haven't said nothing to either of us in months."

"I deserve to have a relationship with my boys—"

Callum sighs. He closes his eyes and rocks back on his heels. Ben wants to reach out to him, but if he does that then Jonno will say some awful again, because Jonno is incapable of anything else. "I'm guessing," Callum says. "I'm guessing you're only here because everyone else has binned you, right? None of your old buddies willing to let you kip on their couch?"

"I put a roof over your head—"

"And you made me feel like I wasn't a real person for the entire time, Dad. Longer than that." He leans against the wall and closes his eyes. "Go away, Dad. I have a life here. Ben's daughter is coming over for dinner and a movie in a bit. You don't want me for a son except when you need something but I'm good without you. I have family here. Could you just go?"

"He's got a _ daughter?" _

"Watch yourself, mate," Ben grunts.

"Dad," Callum says. He unfolds himself, stepping forward and pressing his hands against Ben, like they are anchored together. "Let's skip all of this, okay? You're gonna get drunk and end up yelling at people in the street until someone calls the police on ya. Just don't do it around here, okay? I'm not letting you spew shit anywhere near Lexi, you got that?" He's avoiding eye contact with Ben. They don't talk about it, how it kind of freaked Ben out that Callum gets along so well with Lexi, or that he's just part of the weird parental squad with Ben and Lola and even Jay now. Whitney of all people asked him about that, one day in the caff but he hasn't actually asked Callum how _ he _ feels about it.

"You're both ungrateful, you and your brother. The pervert and the idiot—"

Callum stamps on Jonno's foot and he retracts it sharply. The door closes abruptly and he ends up on his back, watching Callum turn the lock and brace his hands. "Jesus," Ben says. "Is it inappropriate that I thought that was hot?"

Callum snorts. "I'm a little more worried that he's gonna still be out there when Lola and Lexi show up, babe."

"We can call Lola and warn her," Ben says.

"I _ am _ impressed you didn't try to batter him the second you opened the door."

"If I pick a fight and he calls the old Bill, right? No thanks." Ben holds out his hand and Callum hauls him up. He can kind of make out Jonno shouting stuff outside. "So we're definitely ordering takeaway, right?"


	2. Chapter 2

Jonno's long gone—apparently—when Lola shows up to drop Lexi off. That doesn't stop Ben from taking a step outside to give the street a once-over while he ushers them both inside. Lexi sits down on the bottom stair and begins to untie her shoes. "Everything's fine," Ben says, when Lola gives him a look. "Cal's dad just decided to stop by for a  _ friendly _ visit."

Lola starts to say something but Lexi gasps. "Do I get to meet Callum's daddy?"

"No, darling," Ben says. He shuts the door and locks the deadbolt. "Callum's daddy is a very busy person." Hopefully very busy and very far away from now on. "Callum don't see him very often."

"That's sad," Lexi says.

Ben tries to keep his face as neutral as possible. "That's why he's got us to take care of him, sweetheart." He clears his throat. "Why don't you head upstairs? He's trying to decide what we should order for dinner, you know how he takes forever to make up his mind."

"Can we have egg rolls?"

"You should  _ absolutely _ go upstairs and ask him," Ben says, smirking.

Ben and Lola watch Lexi pull her shoes off and scramble up the stairs. Once she loudly yells hello at Callum, Ben sighs. "Sorry, I should have kept my gob shut until she was out of earshot." 

"Yeah, but when have you ever kept your gob shut about  _ anything, _ eh?"

Upstairs, Lexi is yelling at Callum and he's very calmly responding to her. "You're probably right," Ben says. If Callum could hear  _ them, _ he'd only agree with Lola; Ben blew his whole life up, after all. Not that he's about to feel bad about that, especially now. "I guess it  _ is _ one of my better qualities—"

"Wouldn't go that far," Lola says, and elbows him. "What was he doing here?"

"Come to beg, apparently—but not so much that he can't get in a few shots at me."

"How's Callum taking it?"

Ben gnaws at his lower lip. Callum laid down the law with Jonno, made it clear that he isn't welcome—in their flat, in the Square—but he's been quiet since it happened, pacing upstairs rather than settling down. Ben can guess, because he's been through shit like this with Phil more times than he can count—even if it isn't exactly the same—that Callum's brain is probably churning right now, replaying and replaying and replaying. Ben would get loud, violent, when it would happen with Phil but Callum goes deadly quiet. "He'll be okay," he says. "He's dealing with it." He takes a breath. "Looked dead sexy telling Jonno to fuck off, I'll tell you that."

"Ugh," Lola says. "I do  _ not _ need to hear about your kinks."

Ben shrugs, and tilts his head. "You wanna stay for dinner tonight? Callum's torn the kitchen apart and we're just getting a takeaway instead, but you could text Jay and we could all hang out." 

Lola raises an eyebrow. "I mean, we ain't got any plans-plans, but—are you sure? You think Cal's gonna want us lot around after everything with Jonno?"

"Honestly, it'll probably calm him down," Ben says. "Hey, Cal! Lola and Jay are gonna be here for dinner too!"

"Good, I need more hands on decking for dealing with this awful  _ dragon _ you've invited into the house," Callum calls down the stairs.

"I'm not being a dragon right  _ now, _ Callum!"

A piece of sweet and sour pork almost goes down the wrong tube and Ben ends up coughing, whacking a hand against his chest, because Lola and Jay are fighting with Lexi about how many egg rolls she can take, and how she needs to eat some of the beef and broccoli because  _ ya need the vitamins, don't ya, missy.  _ At some point, they built a family and it wasn't the one he was expecting. He doesn't even worry that much about Phil approving of him these days, they mostly have an equilibrium between them—and on the bad days, when the doubt creeps in or Phil backslides, well, he can press his forehead against Callum's until the urge to kick and scream abates.

He looks up, because Callum has been in the kitchen for a long time, ostensibly to get fresh beers for everybody, and sees him hovering over by the sink, a six-pack hanging by its plastic rings from his fingers. Ben could call out, but then Jay and Lola and Lexi would look over, and Ben knows by now that Callum doesn't like too much attention when he's spiralling.

Instead, Ben stands up, ruffling Lexi's hair as he passes before ruffling Jay's hair ("Oi!") and slipping into the tight space behind his boyfriend.

"Cal?"

"Hmmm?"

Ben settles in behind Callum, fingers working their way into the loops of his boyfriend's jeans. "Want me to take the beers to the table?"

"What?" Callum raises the six-pack, like he didn't even realize he was holding it. "Sorry," he says. Ben takes the beers and sets them down on the counter. Callum huffs, stretching his arms over his head and letting his heels rise. He touches the ceiling. If it was just the two of them, Ben would accuse him of trying to make him feel short again. Instead, he runs his hands up Callum's back muscles and then lets his hands roam to Calum's chest, pulling him closer. Callum sighs. "Must have spaced out. Sorry."

Ben isn't going to say anything about Callum apologizing twice. "C'mon, babe. Family dinner. You can brood later." He picks the cans back up and then uncoils himself from Callum, right thumb and index finger finding their way back to his belt loops and pulling. "More beers," Ben says, holding the six-pack out until Jay takes it from him and pulls four cans out. Ben maneuvers Callum into the seat across from Lexi and then sits down himself, slapping Callum's knee on the way down.

Lexi is watching Callum very carefully. Ben almost doesn't notice it—he's too busy trying to scoop fried rice into his mouth with chopsticks while Lola flicks packets of plum sauce at him from across the table—but then something clicks for him. He opens his mouth but Lexi is already speaking. "Are you sad about your daddy, Callum?"

Everyone was freezes.

"Uh," Jay says.

"Lexi," Lola says. "I don't think Callum wants to talk about—"

"A little," Callum says, a touch louder than Ben would have expected. "Thanks for asking, Lex."

Lexi nods. "Daddy gets sad about Grandpa sometimes."

Everyone looks at Ben.

"Grandma Kathy says he's  _ mopey." _

Lola snorts. "Maybe a little."

"Sometimes when Daddy's sad I make him dance to Lady Gaga."

"Make him," Jay says, making air quotes.

"And yet you keep telling me you don't dance," Callum says, kicking Ben in the shin. He clears his throat and straightens up. "I'm okay, Lex. Sometimes I just get sad. Your daddy usually cheers me up."

"Or  _ winds _ you up," Jay mutters. "You know how many times a week I have to deal with this one in a strop because of you?"

"It's just annoying," Callum says, hours later, holding a toothbrush covered in toothpaste in one hand and a second, dripping toothbrush half in his mouth.

"You look just so sexy right now," Ben says, snagging the one toothbrush as he turns the corner into the bathroom. "Lexi's passed right out. What's annoying?"

"I'm pissed he can still get to me."

Ben runs the tap over his toothbrush. "I think we both know you don't just get over this shit, Cal."

Callum wipes at his mouth with the back of his hand. "I was—I was losing my shit when he was here."

"You were so calm, though. I was so proud of you."

"I just stomped on his foot."

"You looked so hot."

"Ben."

"You say my name so often out of exasperation," Ben mutters. "I am  _ sorry _ that I find courage so hot. I'm  _ such _ a monster."

"I thought you liked soft lads."

"Soft lads can have courage," Ben says with a mouthful of toothpaste. He bends down to spit it out. "We should have called my old man to beat up your old man again."

Callum rinses his brush. "That totally happened, didn't it? Sometimes Phil looks like he's worried I'm going to bring it up or something."

"I think he genuinely likes you more than he likes me."

"Yes, babe. That's why I ordered Chinese again for dinner. To make it up to you."

"So not because Lexi asked?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Soft lad."


	3. Chapter 3

Neither of them say it, but Jonno Highway starts to feel like another one of the ghosts, waiting to re-materialize.

Ben keeps an eye out every time he leaves the flat, like he used to, after Paul was—after Paul. He tries not to think about anything bad happening to Callum but some days the anxiety bleeds out and then every other person is checking if he's alright because he seems  _ jumpy,  _ because that is absolutely his favourite thing to be asked six hundred times a day.

They're in the caff when it finally happens.

It's a Sunday and they have Lexi today, sitting around one of the tables with iced buns and tea. It's busy, a steady stream of bodies all around them, but Lexi is telling Callum a very involved story about the kids at school and who likes whom while Ben scans the room like he does, like he  _ always _ does. His mother's behind the till and looking all misty and he has to stop himself from rolling his eyes at that. He'll tell her they should do family dinner soon when they head out, that will make her happy.

The door opens. Callum clears his throat. "Ben?" They're holding hands; Ben must have tightened his grip by reflex.

"Don't panic," Ben says, as much to himself as to Callum. Because Lexi is here, and Kathy, and twenty other people. He prefers his fights to be private, without witnesses.

Callum sees him. Ben can tell because Callum very quietly says, "Fuck."

"Daddy, Callum said a swear—"

"I'm sorry, Lexi."

There are enough people in the caff that Ben doesn't think Jonno has seen either of them yet. He hopes that he hasn't seen them yet. Kush is over at one of the tables against the wall and  _ he _ definitely sees Jonno, makes eye contact with Ben right away. He was there that day in the Vic. "There's no free tables," Ben says. He's keeping his voice down. "He'll have to take it to go."

"I was telling you something, Callum," Lexi gripes. "You're supposed to pay attention!"

"Sorry, Lex," Callum says. "Can you hold on for a couple ticks?"

"Why?"

Ben does not want either of them to have to explain this to Lexi. They've talked about homophobia before, but only ever in abstract terms, and definitely not tied to a person like Callum's father. He would prefer to never have to talk about Callum's father. "Sorry, darling," he says. "Somebody's just come in who don't like Daddy very much, okay? We just don't want there to be an argument." He says it because Lexi gets that, has been around Phil and Sharon and the rest enough to know that sometimes  _ avoiding an argument _ is important.

Callum sips his tea. Callum looks like he's curling in on himself. Ben looks back over at the front counter, where Jonno is talking to Ben's mother like he's just a normal person. She's smiling and turning to get him something. Ben wants to watch him but he doesn't want to accidentally make eye contact. He wants to check on Callum but he doesn't want to lose track of Jonno.

"What's he even doing here again?"

"Come to talk to Stuart again?"

"Stuart's not having it, though. And after last time—"

Ben bites into his iced bun. He chews. "Maybe text Stuart?"

"I'm kind of hoping he just  _ goes away _ and I don't have to get my brother involved."

Ben is just hoping his daughter doesn't get dragged into this. "He's going to get his coffee or whatever and he's going to march out of here and we can hang around a little while longer to make sure he's cleared off."

"I'm kind of surprised you ain't picking a fight with him," Callum says. He laughs a little as he says it, but it's his nervous laugh, the one that he used to break out when Ben was messing with him in front of Whitney in the bad old days.

"Ain't doing none of that in front of..." Ben tilts his head in Lexi's direction.

"Right."

Ben takes a sip and then someone says, "Someone really did let you have a kid?"

Callum hasn't let go of Ben's hand. He squeezes—once, twice, three times. He cuts Ben off from responding. "I thought I made it pretty clear last time, when you showed up at our door, that you ain't welcome." He's looking up at Jonno one second but turns to look at Ben, and then Lexi. She's gone quiet, watchful, the way she does whenever there's an argument brewing.

"I'm your father. You can't cut me out of your life forever."

Lexi definitely reacts to that. She looks across at Callum and Ben holds his hand out until she takes it and scoots closer to him.

Jonno sees that. "Aww, don't be scared, little 'un."

Callum looks about ready to climb across the table and put himself between Jonno and Lexi. "Dad," he says, voice like ice. "We can't keep having this conversation. And we're definitely not having it here, in front of—of—" Callum stops and takes a breath. "What are you even doing here? I'm not giving you any money, if that's what you're looking for."

"I work, I don't need the likes of  _ you _ giving me charity."

"That's good," Ben says before he can stop himself. "Because we ain't offering."

Jonno sucks at his lower teeth and sneers. "I ain't talking to you." There is a word implied at the end of the sentence that he isn't going to say—maybe because of what happened at the Vic that time, maybe because there are so many people around, maybe because of Lexi. "What, now I can't say hello to my boy at all? Or meet this one?" He gestures to Lexi. "You a friend of Callum's, sweetheart? I'm his dad."

Ben could say something, but he has a tendency to escalate. Callum squeezes his hand because they both know that this is the case.

"Dad," Callum says, a warning.

"I'm not doing  _ anything _ wrong, Callum."

"You don't have to talk to him, Lex," Ben says. He's keeping his voice light but he's still holding her hand and Callum's hand—which mostly means he can't use his fists, and maybe that's why Callum's holding on so much. Lexi knows that things are weird between Callum and his father, even if they haven't explained why. 

Lexi stares up into Jonno's face. He's trying to do the just-one-of-the-blokes face, smiling like he isn't a monster. "You make Callum sad," Lexi says. "I don't like people who make Callum sad."

Ben freezes. Callum's entire body shifts. "Lexi," Ben says, because he can see his boyfriend gawping. He says her name but he focuses his attention on Jonno, on the snivelling bald-headed asshole standing over them. Callum looms sometimes by virtue of being a giant, but Jonno is  _ actually _ menacing. 

"Proper gob on this one," Jonno says. "I bet I know where she gets it."

That's when Callum lets go of Ben's hand. That's when Callum stands up. "Dad," he says and this time it is loud enough that people look over. Kathy looks over, behind the counter. Ben pulls Lexi closer but does a quick count—at least six or seven people would back them up if it came down to it, mostly because people  _ generally _ like Callum now, after everything with Whitney died down. They might not like Ben, but they like Callum, and occasionally that extends to Ben by strange osmosis. "Leave my family alone," Callum says. He doesn't raise his voice for that bit. Ben would smile at the use of  _ my family _ if not for the situation.

"Family? This—this is what you call  _ family _ now?"

"Oi," Ben says, because even with Callum and Lexi and Kathy around, he can only be so good for so long.

"Wasn't talking to you."

Something has shifted in the air of the caff, because a space is starting to clear out around them. Kush is standing now, and Kathy has wandered over. "Awright, boys?" She steps in front of Jonno. "Lexi? Darling, why don't you come up to the front and we'll get you a biscuit." She holds a hand out, and Ben sighs, letting go of her hand. Kathy seems uninterested in Jonno's seething bluster, but with  _ her _ history, he can't feel like that much of a threat. She turns and looks at Jonno. "If you're harassing these two, I'm gonna need you to go, alright? We're busy today, I haven't got time for loiterers."

Ben coughs and laughs.

"Kathy," Callum says. He sounds embarrassed, because  _ of course _ he's always going to feel like Jonno is his responsibility, no matter how many times Ben tells him differently. "I'll—I'll sort this—"

"I don't think you need to worry about it," Kathy says smoothly. "I think  _ this gentleman _ is going to be heading out now, yes?"\

Jonno puffs himself up. Ben is familiar with the impulse, has done it often enough himself to know when it's fake. He's seen Jonno do it too, always ready to be the hard man, but the difference is that Jonno has been smacked around every time— and there is a moment where it could go one way but then it goes another. Jonno deflates. Not totally, sneering at Callum. "I don't just cease to exist because you're busy being a freak, boy. One day this will all go rotten and—"

"We've heard all of this," Ben says. He's standing up. He looks down at Lexi and hopes she gets he's sorry she has to see and hear all of this even once. "You think telling Cal he's worthless is going to make him want you around? He deserves better than that. Hell, even Stuart deserves it." He looks over. Callum is smirking. Callum smirking always feels like an invitation.

Callum clears his throat. "If you want to come back, you have to prove yourself to me," he says.

Jonno wilts. "Guess I ain't got no sons."

"Guess not," Callum says.

They watch him go. Kathy is still hovering next to them, holding Lexi's hand. Now it is Callum's turn to come undone; he's still on his feet but he starts shaking. "Sorry," he says—to everyone, to the room. "Sorry, Kathy. I keep—"

"Cal," Ben says.

Callum takes a breath. "I'm fine," he says. He gnaws at his knuckle. "Lexi," he says. "I'm sorry you had to—to—"\

"You were very brave," Lexi says, and it occurs to Ben that she is doing an impression of  _ him,  _ probably from getting a shot or going to the dentist or something.

Lexi's impression is so bang on that he has to look up to stop himself from laughing, only then he catches Kathy's eyes and she noticed as well. "Okay," he says, coughing and raising his voice. "You lot— we should give up the table and move along. Why don't we go to the park, sweetheart, and give  _ Callum _ a chance to run around and burn off some energy?"

"Yes!"

Callum looks—relieved. He looks exhausted more than anything, but he willingly accepts Ben's offered hand. "Okay," he says. "But we're cooking tonight, okay? No takeaways."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one felt like it needed a third chapter, although I don't think it turned out exactly as I wanted it to.


End file.
